Today’s Topic
What does your best friend look like? Give as many details as possible.
Writing / 정필규 2021. 07. 14
There are many of friends. First friend: My girl friend is best friend number one of the world. We talk about many thing. Work, Future, Society etc. Let me talk about my best friend look like. She has long hair. The height is shorter than me, however she looks like similar to me. In my opinion, because women's lower body is longer than upper of the body, she looks like similar to me as she seems. What she looks the most pretty in the World is the name of the game. Her inner side raise me get better at almost factor. I am getting better than before while I have the time with her. That's why I saw her looks the most pretty in the World.
Other friends: I can not express about all of my friends. However, I can say my every friends have good appearance and inner side. Because I tend to learn everything from them, I am meeting good people. And I am getting many things from them. But, These days, I can not meet them often. Because of the virus. I believe that I can meet them and get more things and give them many things.
Revised Writing
There are many(I have many types) of friends. First friend: My girl friend(girlfriend) is (my) best friend number one(number one best friend) of(in) the world. We talk about many thing(things).(, such as) Work(work), Future(future), Society(society,) etc. Let me talk about (what) my best friend look(looks) like. She has long hair. The(Her) height is shorter than me(mine), however(,) she looks like(X) similar to me. In my opinion, because (a) women's lower body is longer than (their) upper of the(X) body, (so) she looks like(X) similar to me as she seems. What(X) she looks the most pretty(Her appearance is the prettiest) in the World(world) is the name of the game. Her inner side(resources) raise(encourages) me (to) get better at almost factor(most factors). I am getting(get) better than before while I have the time with her(as I spend time with her). That's why I saw her looks the most pretty in the World(she seems the prettiest in the world for me).
Other friends: I can not express about(fully describe) all of my (other) friends. However, I can say my every friends(each of my friend) have(has a) good appearance and inner side(beauty). Because(OR: Since) I tend to learn everything from them, I am meeting good people. And I am getting many things from them. But,(X) These(these) days, I can not(cannot) meet them often.(X) Because(because) of the virus. I believe that I can meet them and get more things and(to) give them many things(X).
Thank you for completing Step 4. Your topic is interesting to read, and your writing delivered the main idea clearly.Just keep on practicing and familiarizing yourself more with articles, number of nouns, preposition, word order, and subject-verb agreement next time. Keep writing :)
Re-Writing / 정필규
I have many types of friends. First friend: My girlfriend is my girlfriend is my number one best friend in the world. We talk about many things, such as work, future, society, etc. Let me talk about what my best friend looks like. She has long hair. Her height is shorter than mine, however, she looks similar to me. In my opinion, because a women's lower body is longer than their upper body, so she looks similar to me as she seems. Her appearance is the prettiest in the world is the name of the game. Her inner resources encourages me to get better at most factors. I get better as I spend time with her. That's why she seems the prettiest in the world for me.
Other friends: I cannot express fully describe all of my other friends. However, I can say each of my friend has a good appearance and inner beauty. Since I tend to learn everything from them, I am meeting good people. And I am getting many things from them.
But these days, I cannot meet them often because of the virus. I believe that I can meet them and get more things to give them.
문법 & 문장 교정
- About a man.
- He look like average height and skinny. His age is about thirties.
- What does he look like?
- BETTER Please give me a description of him. (SIMILAR)
- My favorite clothes is bikini. But I have never wear.
- Normally, I wear blue pants.
- BETTER Normally, I wear blue jeans.
마무리
교정받은 글을 다시 써보면서 느끼는 점은 내 글을 읽고 교정해주시는 선생님께 너무나도 감사해야 한다는 것이다. 교정해주시는 선생님의 편의를 돕기 위해서라도 글쓰기 실력을 늘리기 위해 노력해야겠다는 걸 절실히 느끼고 있다.
